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If you believe that in order for you to be happy, everything needs to be close to perfect, then you have what author Kristen Houghton deems “‘The Goldilocks Syndrome”™.

“Like Goldilocks, many women can’t be happy until everything in our lives is “just right.” We place the date for   happiness “somewhere in the future” and by doing that, we waste the present.” Kristen explains in her book ‘…AND THEN I’LL BE HAPPY!’

When Kristen talks about ‘many women…’ she’s also referring to her former self — a self-described “Goldilocks” desperately trying to lose 15 more pounds before allowing a tsp. of happiness into her life.   After furiously calorie-counting on, what should’ve been, a worry-free vacation, her husband, turned to her and simply said, ‘You don’t allow yourself to be happy’.  And that’s when it clicked — the lights went on — the angels sang — she was postponing her happiness until…(fill in the blank).

She knew she had to make a change — and so she did.  This former self-saboteur gave up her 15-year teaching career to put pen to paper and give women the tools they need to shake off the unhappiness epidemic. In  a beguiling blend of practical advice and humor, she debunks the myths about how and when women find happiness. Kristen presents the true stories of 14 women who put their happiness on hold for different reasons, provides realistic and applicable tips on what women can do to avoid a similar problem, and identifies the major mindsets that keeps fabulous femmes from attaining happiness.

1.  The first step to empowerment is making you #1.  Take care of yourself first — it is NOT selfish!   Just like during an airplane emergency, you secure your own mask, before helping someone else secure theirs — feed this analogy into your daily routine.

2.  Too often women look toward relationships to enhance their life, but that is not a realistic source of happiness — not to mention a far too big a burden to place on any man!  Look within yourself to find happiness — it’s in there — probably hiding behind your left lung or appendix.

3.  Women who postpone their personal goals for other people/things (i.e. spouse, children, job) don’t leave time for a balanced or happy life.   There is nothing wrong with post-poning motherhood or not having children at all (despite what people with a 1950′s mentality may tell you) — it’s your personal choice.   Katherine Hepburn said it best, “You can’t have a career and family life that are equal, one will always take precedence”.  And there’s nothing wrong with you if you choose career or better yet, YOU first!

4.  While women are thinking ‘I should/shouldn’t do this”, men are thinking ‘I will do this; I am going to do this!’.  A woman’s lack of self-belief (regardless of how successful she appears) will cause a lifelong delay in happiness.  So start thinking like a woMAN and know that you will do this; you are going to do this!

5.  Kristen still sees many young girls having self-esteem issues when competing with males in the classroom or workplace.  Who’s to blame?  A combination of the media’s portrayal of beauty over brains, coupled with parents teaching their daughters that ‘you can do anything, as long as you’re gorgeous’.  Women of all ages need to adopt the mentality, ‘First and foremost, I am intelligent — and I happen to look pretty good to’.

6.  Kristen is very passionate about women in relationships and believes a relationship should enhance your life, not make your miserable.  And it should never be so emotionally draining that it becomes a 2nd job. Love yourself enough to leave an unhealthy relationships — even if it hurts.  Remember, you love YOU more!

7.  Don’t fear rejection!  Kristen never let rejection, after rejection, after…rejection…stop her.  She insists, ‘Failure isn’t bad, it just means that what you tried didn’t work, so keep trying until it does!’

With a foreword and endorsement by Dr. Janet Taylor, prominent NYC psychiatrist and “Today Show”  correspondent, this book is for anyone who’s ever penciled in her own happiness for some future date.  By the end of this ready, you’ll be ready to grab a permanent hot pink marker, take a look at your happiness calendar, and circle TODAY!