I attended a mindfulness lecture a few weeks ago, which I thought was quite fitting with this month’s topic on meditation. Hearing the speaker discuss mindfulness affirmed how valuable this particular technique can be and the variety of ways that it can be used.
Mindfulness is one skill that plays a part in the meditative process. It is an artfully developed skill of paying attention without judging the experience. For many individuals, when stress is experienced, it’s difficult to not judge it. “I can’t believe he/she/I did that”, “I/He/She should know better”, “I/He/She is so rude” “There’s too much to do”, and on and on it goes. Mindfulness acknowledges these thoughts are present, but we don’t react to them. We are only observing them as they flow through our thought-body. When we are paying attention to the experience, it allows an opportunity for us to expand or constrict our moment-to-moment awareness.
With stress, some individuals focus on future aspects or past aspects that increase the stress experience. By focusing on the moment-to-moment experience, without judging, it may actually decrease the level of stress noticed in the moment. This can truly be a stress reliever.
When exploring meditation, I describe to clients that there are three ways to conceptualize meditation. It can be constrictive, expansive or transcendental. The way I describe it to clients is that you have options in terms of paying attention to one sense, to many senses, or transcending the “sense experience”. Most of the meditative modes involve utilizing the five senses: sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell. We often spend most of our day in our minds and reacting to what the mind says, rather than the information we obtain through our senses. So we tend to ignore what we are experiencing in the moment and focus on what our mind tells us to experience. Recognizing that we can utilize our senses for managing stress is an option. We can also utilize the skill of mindfulness.
While most clients seem to benefit from the constrictive and expansive meditative practices, how it is used depends on the individual. Sitting in a lotus position is not the only option. There are a variety of “modes” that exist, for example, an object meditation (see below); a lovingkindness meditation, walking, eating, and laundry meditations are a few. While they tend to be more here and now focused, they can be relaxing and provide a different perspective and/ or experience of stress. Here’s a popular meditation I teach clients and they generally respond well to it.
Find an object you typically have with you, such as your watch, a piece of jewelry or wallet. I usually discourage cash, credit cards. Close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths and focus your attention on the texture of the item. What does the surface feel like? Is it bumpy, smooth? Maybe ridged and sharp? Then focus on the temperature of this item. Does it feel warm? Cool? As you are mentally describing these aspects, think of something positive in your life right now that reminds you of this texture and perhaps, the temperature. When you have this phrase/image/memory present, hold it in your mind and continue to rub your object. This will help you anchor your image to the object. What this allows for is the ability to distract your mind from the stress you may be experiencing and keep focus on what’s present. This may help in managing stress, because it directs your attention to something externally in your control (object) while connecting it with a positive image of something that relaxes you.
The idea with meditation and mindfulness, is giving yourself an opportunity to go beyond your “comfort zone”. Most individuals I work with want to stress less. Meditation is a great technique to help you get there. Next month I will focus on how achievements can help with managing stress smarter.
Here’s to your success in managing your stress!
#Please note that this article includes a modified excerpt from an upcoming book on managing stress.
Serena Wadhwa Psy.D., LCPC, CADC
www.triqualiving.com
